葛葉ライドウ (Kuzunoha Raidou XIV) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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synopsychic2018-04-10 07:04 pm
capital_asset) wrote in synopsychic2018-04-10 07:04 pm
Entry tags:
[walkabout] Duck? Rabbit, Duck? [backdated to the first week of April]
I'm beginning to feel like I'm monopolizing the network, but... two things:
One, I had another prophetic dream last night: The Manticore looming over a puppet theatre, making a skeletal marionette dance on the graves of the Third Reich.
Two, I think I've figured out who we're carrying around with us - or rather, whose soul. Have any of you heard of Koschei the Deathless?
One, I had another prophetic dream last night: The Manticore looming over a puppet theatre, making a skeletal marionette dance on the graves of the Third Reich.
Two, I think I've figured out who we're carrying around with us - or rather, whose soul. Have any of you heard of Koschei the Deathless?
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And-- oh, I can make a template of the casket too, so we can keep something real-looking when we get back out of Liminal. I'm the one carrying it anyway, so no one's gonna notice it doesn't weigh the same.
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[They'd just have to make sure no one gets their hands on the fake casket.
...Maybe they could get Yohann to blow it up.]
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Look, I'm not-- I'm not trying to be an asshole about this, but, like. [He finally lets his exhaustion slip through, just a fraction.] What the fuck are we supposed to do.
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I know you're not. And I don't know. It'd be one thing if we could trust any of these people, but...
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[he's not feeling guilty about the plane blowing up you are]
...at least when we're back the others would understand.
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[He suspects Yosuke in particular will have a rough time of it once he's himself again, but he can't imagine the others being particularly happy about their parts in this walkabout, either. Raidou certainly wouldn't be, in their place.]
The increased patrols and equipment "failures" aren't really helping matters either. I suppose the presence of an active saboteur shouldn't be surprising, in retrospect.
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[Private]
How are you... holding up, for lack of a better phrase?
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[Private]
[Congrats, Raidou, you get a tired sigh out of him.]
I mean I'm not hot shit right now, but neither's anybody else. This is a shitty goddamn situation.
And like, I knew this wasn't gonna be easy, it's a fucking war zone. But it's still, like. [There's a brief flash of frustration] Would've been happy not getting a new kind of PTSD, thanks.
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[Though hopefully not dungeon-level unhappy.]
[Private]
[Raidou actually knows what PTSD is, courtesy of Thorne.]
Is there anything I can do to help?
[Besides "not die again."]
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[Private]
Not sure. When we get back to Liminal I am probably gonna either never leave your side or go and hide in my room for like a week. It's how I did after escaping the Hedge.
[Except he hadn't had anyone to help comfort him after that one, so the phase lasted a lot longer.]
So just- don't mind me being weird.
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[Granted, some of them are more resilient than others.]
[Private]
If you... want company hiding away, I can do that. Although Tama will probably insist on being there, too.
[There's a certain tentativeness behind that offer. This is all still very new to him.]
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[Only almost, because he might still be bitter about missing out on Hogwarts for this.]
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...that sounds nice, actually. As long as Tama doesn't get too weirded out by me.
[He'll definitely need some actual proper alone time, but he will appreciate Raidou being back in his normal body where he can get it.]
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[Raidou knows nothing about Hogwarts, but he'd like to hope that someone had a tolerable time this round. Granted, it would have been nice if they were too, but... well.]
[Private]
[Raidou gets the need for proper alone time - he'll probably need some as well - but he also needs some time to be around Gil when they're not surrounded quite so closely by other people.]
She adjusted to the demons pretty quickly, and she's gotten to like Thorne, although the vampirism confused her at first. She's not all that fond of Jules, but that's more because of all the screaming than anything else.
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If anyone's fond of Jules specifically because of the screaming, I have some serious questions for them.
[And there's a small note of amusement in his voice as he says that.]
...how are you holding up so far? Cos you might be winning for 'shittiest time on walkabout' right now.
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So would I, honestly.
[And there's the question he was expecting. Truthfully, Raidou's not sure how to answer it. He knows what he's supposed to say ("I'm fine"), but he also knows that's a lie, and one Gil will see through easily at that. And Raidou really doesn't want to lie to Gil. Still, he's not used to just admitting things are bothering him, so there's a long pause before he answers.]
I... would very much like to not be piloting someone else's corpse right now.
[There's a slightly distant tone in his voice, one Gil will probably recognize as an indicator that he's dissociating a little. This is bringing back some very unpleasant memories.]
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[Well, he's not surprised at all by that response. Nor the dissociating, but he's not sure how much he can do to ground Raidou with that one; even if Raidou were the kind of person who appreciated physical affection, it would probably just make it worse to ask if he needed a hug or something while he's. Like that.]
Yeah. No, that's entirely legit. But we've been here for a pretty good few weeks now, we've gotta be more than halfway through this. It won't be for much longer.
[Unless Raidou getting killed again doesn't bring him back in another borrowed body; but if there's no guarantee he won't get his own body out of it, Gil's not about to suggest it in a hurry.]
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The last time something like this happened, there was a week and a half left to the Jaunt. But that was an overlay, and not... this.
[This being a completely different body. No matter how alien it had felt to Jouhei after a decade or so of Ai being in near-complete control, it had at least been his body.]
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[At least when Gil used to die a lot, he was always in the one body. He can't really imagine what it'd be like to wake up in a genuinely different body each time, not one that's just got some fancy new scars. He doesn't want to, frankly.]
Sounds about the same as now, yeah. Just gotta take it one day at a time, right? And with how fucked everything is, they're coming at us fast enough that we'll be back in Liminal in no time.
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I'm not sure whether that's comforting or not.
[His mental voice still mostly sounds hollow and distant, but there's an undertone of dryness in that statement, which could be taken as a good sign.]
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I think it just is what it is. We can do this.
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[There's a pause while Raidou takes the time to absorb Gil's words.]
You're right - we can.